statesFebruary 9, 2010 6:22 pm

I heard them way before I saw them.  At first I thought I was imagining them, just hearing the fans or ambient noise coming from the building I was passing.  But as I walked on, the sound became more distinct and I knew I wasn’t making them up.  I finally found them in the quad, a line of people all in front of a different drum, each creating a different sound that all came together to create a beautiful rhythm.  People had gathered around to let the sound wash over them and I was disappointed that I had to go catch my bus.  Hearing and seeing them reminded me of fond memories in Golden Gate Park, with the long line of congas that are played all.day.long.  There’s something wonderful about such concrete rhythm, the kind that you can feel emanate from the ground and fill your whole body.  It was soothing (as ironic as that might seem) and I could have stayed there all day.

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statesFebruary 8, 2010 12:00 am
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September 1, 2003
 
I had just turned 16, he was 18.  At first we communicated through instant messenger, than I finally got a cell phone and we talked every night.  I wasn’t allowed to drive to see him at first, but after a summer of my parents driving me up at least once a month and a pair of forgotten rental gloves, I was allowed to make the journey alone.  And I did, as many times as I could.  We went to prom, Mexico and camp together.  It was a great two years.  Then I broke up with him.  For a year and a half, he was always on my mind but I was too angry or stubborn or scared to contact him.  We finally did reconnect and eventually started dating again.
 
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September 1, 2007
 
At the end of May 2008, he asked me to marry him.  How could I say no?  And so.  We’ve now been married 6 months; how time has flown.  And yet, it feels like it’s been like this forever.  In a way, I suppose it has, 6 and a half years is a long time to know someone.  I am so blessed to be able to share my life with my best friend.  I remember before we met thinking how romantic high-school sweethearts were, and then I realized, I’m part of that.  Of course, things aren’t always perfect, but even through the rough patches, I know I am deeply loved and I am so thankful to be able to give my love in return.
 
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 August 8, 2009
statesFebruary 7, 2010 10:05 pm

I think, deep down (or not so deep for some of us), we all desire a connection.  We search for connections everywhere, amongst friends and even with strangers.  I love feeling even the small connection from receiving a smile from a stranger, a spark of joy when laughter is shared between us.  Even something as trivial as finding out someone else shares a love of The Office makes me feel a connection to them and they’re somehow an even better person because of it.  Maybe it’s shallow to feel this way, but I believe everyone feels it to some degree or another.  Think about your friends, there’s got to be something connecting you.

There’s only been one time I’ve tried watching the Super Bowl, it was the year that Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake performed during Halftime.  Yeah, not exactly something that gave me the desire to watch it again.  Anyway, I did watch it tonight with my Life Group from church.  Well, I watched the last half.  And it wasn’t as bad as I was expecting, though I could have lived with less beer commercials and more Google ones, but whatever.  One thing that did strike me was the connection fans had to their teams and the way the team must be connected with one another.  How cool is that?  (I will refrain from commenting on the fact that 90% of Americans were apparently watching the game tonight.)

It’s important for humans to feel connected; I don’t believe we’re meant to be alone.  I know some people prefer to be alone, goodness knows I need my privacy every now and then, but I believe that everyone desires at least one connection.  I’m thankful I’ve found mine.

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statesFebruary 4, 2010 12:38 pm

I’ve discovered there’s a simple joy in the act of walking.  I love feeling the rhythm of my steps sync to that of the beating of my heart and slow, steady breathing.  I love feeling connected to the earth and the wind whipping my hair into a frenzy.  I love knowing how much easier it is to hear the bird’s song or watch her take flight, the ease with which I can stop and capture beauty through a lens.  I know that if I were to shout, my words would be carried away from my lips the moment they escaped.  There is a beauty in these simple things.  Thus, I walk on.

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states 12:03 am

Last Thursday the whole school (actually, several cities) lost power for a few hours.  As soon as I arrived that morning, I went to the library to print out the powerpoint for a class.  The first thing I noticed was how dark it was inside.  None of the computers were on and there were people walking around with flashlights.  I even had to have my backpack checked before I could leave since the security sensors weren’t working.  I thought maybe it was just the library building so I went over to another building and almost immediately realized there was no power there either.  As I was walking to yet another building, I noticed the automatic doors of the bookstore were locked in place, open about a foot or so.  I figured the whole campus had lost power but decided to check one more computer lab just to be sure.  As I suspected, it had no power either so I made my way to my class. 

Everyone was outside since our classroom has no windows.  Our teacher decided to let us off for the day so a friend of mine and I went to check on the status of our other classes.  Her teacher wasn’t in his office and mine hadn’t decided if he was going to cancel class yet or not.  My friend and I decided to hang out in a quiet area while we waited to hear from our teachers.  As we sat, we enjoyed the silence of the campus and the freedom from technology for a little while.  I realized again how dependent society is on electricity and other forms of technology.  I was actually really bummed when the power went back on.  My other class was cancelled though.  I’m kind of hoping for another power outage today.  And that’s not because it means I’d have no class.

statesJanuary 16, 2010 3:28 am

Apparently "How He Loves" is actually written by John Mark McMillan.  Oh well, I love his version too.  I almost always get all choked up when he starts crying as he’s singing.

states 2:15 am

 

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I decided to take advantage of my last big break before I entered the job world by traveling south to visit my (bio) family (someone pointed out that Jason is my family, a fact I love but had forgotten.  Hey, we’ve only been married 5 months…).  I’m so glad I was able to make the trip because it ended up being an incredible week spent with friends and family.  What follows is my description of the week, written here purely for my benefit, a way of documenting what transpired.  (In other words, it’s realllllly long and might be boring to anyone that isn’t me.)
 
Saturday (January 2)
Rode Grayhound from 10am until 5:30pm, having a momentary freakout when I thought I had missed a transfer.  Got picked up by the fam and went to the mall for dinner.  I realized how out of place it all felt, being surrounded by so many people and feeling kinda frumpy.  I’ve never really liked going to the mall, too much consumerism and shallowness for my taste, but I felt further removed than ever.  It was odd feeling like I was more acclimated to life up North than where I’d spent most of my life.  I also realized how much I appreciate the laid back nature of where I currently reside.  But.  I also realized how, despite my distaste for crowds and the busybusybusy life of the city, I feel more alive and comfortable when I’m surrounded by lots and lots of people and activity, even if I have no direct involvement.  It’s an odd kind of realization, one I’m still trying to wrap my head around more than a week later.
 
After dinner we walked around the mall a bit, catching up on little tid bits of life and (me in something of a daze) admiring the still-present Christmas decorations.  Micah had gotten "Killer Bunnies" (crazy card game) for Christmas and wanted to teach us how to play.  We couldn’t finish an entire game since we had to get up early-ish for church.  It was complicated but I enjoyed it (did that have anything to do with the fact that I "won?").
 
Sunday (January 3)
Went to church, caught up with people, was pleasantly surprised to see old friends that I hadn’t expected to see at all.  Ate lunch at a wonderful Mexican restaurant locally owned.  Mmmm good.  Mom and I took Shadow on a long walk, talked some more about what’s going on in our lives and enjoyed the sunshine and each other’s company. 
 
Micah and I went to a night service for the church we both worked for (he still works there actually).  We were invited to Hilary’s (had no idea who this was or most of the people talking about it) house for a game of Settler’s of Catan. Micah and I were quite famished so we met a group downtown for dinner and headed over to Hilary’s.  They had just finished setting up the game when we arrived (ka-chow, perfect timing) and since there were so many of us, we made teams.  I decided to pair up with Tim.  Yeah, had no idea who he was but he seemed nice enough.  The game was quite intense and we would have won if everyone had decided to go to 10 points.  Conveniently, the winning score wasn’t chosen until we had about 8 points and 12 was finally decided on.  So we didn’t win, but in my mind, we did.
 
We moved to the living room after cleaning up and talked about college and the future.  After a while, Hilary suggested we go to the playground down the street and play some games.  She shot off names like "hot lava monster" (which I’m pretty sure everyone and their mom knows how to play) and "blastoff" (huh?).  Everyone decided on "blastoff" and while we were walking down the darkened street, I asked Micah what this game was.  He described it as one where you get thrown in the air.  "Oh."  I was a little scared for my life.  Turns out, it’s a pretty awesome game.  Each arm and leg is held by different people and a fifth person stands over your head and counts off in a silly voice.  We each got two turns and it was quite the rush to watch the people disappear from your periphery and just see the night sky filled with stars.  Afterwards we played few rounds of hide-and-go-seek tag.  As Micah and I walked back to the car, a cop car pulled up to the group we’d left behind.  Apparently someone had called the cops because we had been too loud.  Whatever.  We got home at 11:30.
 
Monday (January 4)
Dad had asked if I was free for lunch so we headed over the mountains to the coast.  It was a clear, sunny day, chilly in the shade but magnificent all around.  After eating at a small diner, we walked the street and ended up spending about half an hour taking pictures of the outdoor section of a wonderful knick knack store.   We kept exploring the town, stopping for dessert and then driving north to visit a small shop and then some tidepools.  As we were driving back over the hill, we couldn’t help but stop and take some pictures of the sunset.  We had to hop a fence and hike to the edge of the hill, but it was well worth the trek.  That’s one thing I appreciate about Dad; as a fellow photographer he doesn’t mind hopping fences and working a little to get the shot he wants.  We had a great time and I’ve added a lot to my photo pool.
 
That night we had an Office game night at our house.  We had 6 people over, a total of 8 to play. One of the girls brought over enchiladas (sooo good!) and we feasted before diving into our board game.  Because there were so many of us, we ended up having two two-person teams and a game that lasted about an hour and a half.  Micah and Lauren had gotten six ties as prizes for those who won first (paisley) second (silver) and third (a bronze-ish color, kinda looked like gold) for both the games.  Since the first game lasted so long, some people had to leave early so there were no teams for the DVD game.  That one didn’t last nearly as long but we were pretty exhausted by the end.  Lauren and Katie (Lauren’s sister) stayed to help wash and put away dishes and afterwards we played a card game called "Beans."  I ended up winning (w00t) and by the time they left, it was about 1:30am.  It was a great night.
 
Tuesday (January 5)
After getting about 5 hours of sleep, I headed to The Best Thrift Store In The World and then met an old friend at Starbucks.  We had a nice time catching up as we watched the cars go by outside.  It was then that I was reminded again of how different that world is from the one I’m living in now.  There’s a lot more glamour masking the poverty and it’s a lot easier to hide behind fancy cars and spacious homes, forgetting the state of most of the world, including the third-world citizens inhabiting the very city one resides in.  I was struck again by the way poverty doesn’t hide here, there are signs everywhere reminding me that I’m so blessed to have a home, income and regular meals.  This issue continues to tug at my heartstrings.
 
The rest of the afternoon was spent making pizza dough and experimenting with toppings, walking Shadow around the neighborhood and catching up on my leisure reading.   That night Mom and I headed to the City to watch the famous "Wicked."  I had heard so many wonderful things about the show and was very excited to finally witness it for myself.  I was not disappointed and neither was Mom.  She kept thanking me for the idea (when I found out Leanna was going on Friday, I decided to ask Mom if she wanted to see it too).  The music, props, costumes and cast were incredible.  I loved seeing "behind-the-scenes" of the classic "Wizard of Oz" story.  Absolutely brilliant.  Thanks, Mom.
 
Wednesday (January 6)
Since both my parents weren’t working (Dad was required to use his vacation time and Mom had requested the day off since she knew we’d get home late from "Wicked") the three of us headed up to The City.  We walked around the skyscrapers, visited Coit Tower and the Legion of Honor, and browsed Amoeba Music on Haight street.  I loved being able to spend some quality time with my parents and see parts of The City I hadn’t seen before.
 
At 10 o’clock that night I went over to Katie’s place to celebrate our friend’s birthday and play "Murder Mystery" (inspired by The Office, our favorite show).  The game actually didn’t start until about 10:45 and we finished well after midnight.  Fortunately, I wasn’t the murderer, although I thought I was at first.  It was pretty awesome and we had a lot of fun developing our characters and practicing our southern accents (well, I didn’t, but some of us did).  Good times.  I think I got home at 3am.
 
Thursday (January 7)
Micah was supposed to drop me off at Leanna’s on his way to work but his car wasn’t working.  So I was going to ride a bike to her house but she was able to pick us up (whew).  We ended up sitting in the backyard, enjoying the sunshine and watching her two black labs frolic in the grass.  As it started cooling down, we headed inside and talked some more.  We caught up on each other’s lives talking about everything from cooking to kids.  It was wonderful to just hang out.  I’m glad to hear she’s staying in the area so I can pretty much see her anytime I visit my parents.
 
Mom picked me up at 5:15 and we headed to the bank to cash in some of my bonds (they’re how I paid for this last(!!!) semester of school :).  I was told that they could only cash in 5 of my 27 bonds per day (I already knew this) but the guy knew I needed the money by Saturday so after he had done 5, he asked me to hand him 5 more.  He also told me that bonds are kind of a gray area so he suggested that I bank hop and turn in 5 at a time at each the next day.  I love helpful people.
 
Quiet dinner with my parents and then the house to myself for a few hours while they went to worship practice.
 
Friday (January 8)
I woke up at 6:30am to meet Steph for breakfast.  It was a very brief meeting but it was great to spend some time with her since we missed each other over Thanksgiving break.
 
Our month-iversary. :)  Jason was supposed to come on Saturday, stopping at his parents and spending the night there Friday night, but he ended up driving all the way down.  I made more pizza dough so Jason could also experience the amazingness of "no red sauce" pizza.  Mmmm.  After Mom got home from work we went and picked up tickets for Avatar 3D and cashed in some more bonds.  This bank told us that the interest couldn’t exceed $1,000 so I again turned in 10, leaving me with 7.  Sweet.  We went to yesterday’s bank and the lady told me she’d "play dumb" and cash in the 7.  Hallelujah, I had all the money to pay for school.  Mom and I went to pick up Micah’s car from the shop and drop it off so he could get home.  As we were driving back home, Jason called to say he had arrived and I told him we’d be there soon.
 
Oh.  It was so good to see him.  The week was bittersweet without him around.  And I’m really glad he made it for our 5 month-iversary.  That night we ate at a family-fave restaurant before heading to the movie.  During the movie I discovered motion sickness.  It didn’t help that the screen almost filled all my vision or that the 3D made the zigs and zags through the forest way too realistic for my taste.  I had to perch the glasses on my head a few times to avoid having to leave the theater.  But it was a good time despite the nauseous moments.  Afterwards, a few of the movie goers (there were 9 in our group) came back to the house and we played another game of "Beans."  I won again (hahahaha).  Then we played "Killer Bunnies" and Jason won with a single carrot!  It was 3:30am by the time we were done cleaning up and 4 by the time we actually went to bed.  Good times.
 
Saturday (January 9)
We slept in.
 
After eating lunch with my parents, Jason and I headed out to the thrift store.  We found a lot of great stuff.  He found a pair of pants and a really nice sweater-shirt thing.  I found two shirts and an assortment of kitchen stuff (including a springform pan and two really nice cake pans :).  We also came away with a really nice satellite chair (as we like to call them) that cost us $15 and the original owner $52.  Boo-ya.  AND.  We found this totally random game that we were introduced to years ago by a friend.  It’s called "Enchanted Forest" and it was in great condition.  This is my favorite thrift store because on Tuesdays before 1pm all clothing is half off and on normal Saturdays and Sundays everything (except mattresses) is 30% off.  They come up with all kinds of reasons to make Saturdays (and sometimes Sundays) 50% off everything.  So the Saturday we were there, everything was half off.  We made out like bandits.  Goodness I love that place.
 
After coming home with our loot, a few people came over to play another game of Settler’s in which Jason won.  By the time we were done, there were 11 of us total and we had enjoyed a nice pasta meal put on by Micah and a few others gathered.  We were all going to a Switchfoot concert(!!!!) in The City.  We took separate vehicles and our group got a little lost but was able to find a parking garage for $8 not far from the venue.  We walked through the darkened streets and found where the concert was to be held.  Then we proceeded to follow the looooooooooong line until we found the end.  As we were placing ourselves at the end of the line, we happened to see the Switchfoot members walk out of a Thai restaurant Right.In.Front.Of.Us.  We were mere feet from them and they just smiled at us, we smiled back, exchanged salutations and said we’d see them later.  Oh.My.Gosh.  AND.  We were the only ones that saw them since we were the only ones facing their direction.  Wow.  I loved that we didn’t freak out and act all fangirl on them; I’m sure they appreciated the low-key run-in.
 
The concert.  It was amazing.
 
First, a band called Paper Tongues came on.  I looooved them. The singer was really enthusiastic and fun, he danced all over the stage and had an amazing range.  I really liked their sound and energy.  And they pumped us up and were a good warm up for the main event. 
 
Switchfoot. How does one describe one of their epic concerts?  I doubt it’s really possible but I will try and highlight the main parts.  The venue we were at was basically standing room only.  Somehow Jon managed to get to the back of the crowd and get on top of the sound booth box thingy (at least I think that’s what it was since I couldn’t really see what he was standing on) and began singing from there, while crazy fans tried to grab hold.  That in itself was quite epic. They played the entire "Hello, Hurricane" album (I sadly do not own it yet) and then got to their "oldies."  I, of course, decided to leave my purse and (therefore) my camera in the car and so do not have any good recordings of the concert, only a few terrible cell phone shots (that I’ll never be able to retrieve from my phone’s memory) and what I can remember from the night.  They like doing mash-ups and they used Beyonce’s "Crazy Right Now" as the bookends to one of their songs (though I cannot for the life of me remember which of their songs was entangled in the "oh oh oh oh"s of Beyonce).  When they played "Only Hope," Sara Watkins of Nickel Creek joined Jon on the stage, gracing us with a beautiful guitar/violin duet and even singing the second verse.  But for me the most amazing part of the show was when they played "Dare You to Move," "Meant to Live" and "Awakening."  "Dare You to Move" has become something of a prayer for me and tears ran down my face as I joined the audience in lifting my hands and singing with all the breath left in me.  "Meant to Live" had the strobe lights working double time and the audience off the floor and head bangin’ to the beat.  And "Awakening" has always struck something in me and I think it fits in perfectly with where I’m at right now and the ambitions I have for myself.
 
It was, in a word, amazing.  And Jason told me I should include the part where he got felt up before being allowed to enter the building.
 
Sunday (January 10)
We went to church, said hi and bye to people and ate lunch with my parents.  Eventually we left my parent’s house, only to drive a few miles to the Best Barnes & Noble In The World.  We didn’t leave there until after dinner and didn’t arrive at Jason’s parents until 7pm.  We spent some time talking with Mom and then watched "Anger Management."  I was not impressed.  But that comes as no surprise since I pretty much hate all Adam Sandler movies.
 
Monday (January 11)
We had breakfast with Mom and then drove back home.  But do I really consider it home since my heart literally ached to be leaving?  Or was it just the dread of leaving the sunshine (though I guess not really since it was overcast when we left) and coming back to school in a week? I’m not really sure but it was difficult to leave and every mile weighed on me.
 
 ***
 
It’s better now that we’re back and have spent some time with the people we love up here.  But it’s still difficult to think about only seeing our families every now and again for fleeting moments.  sigh   Life goes on and so will I.  I’m just so thankful that I was able to visit for an entire week and that I was able to do so much.  I came down not really having any plans for the week and quickly filled my schedule.  It was wonderful and amazing and and and.
 
 
 
Btw, congratulations if you read every word of this amazingly loooooong post.  You must be really bored. ;)

statesJanuary 14, 2010 4:28 pm

This is currently one of my favorite worship songs.  Every time we sing it in church, I get goosebumps and tears always fill my eyes. It is amazing.

How He Loves

 

He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
And I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

And oh, how He loves us, oh
Oh how He loves us
How He loves us, oh

He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
And I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

And oh, how He loves us, oh
Oh how He loves us
How He loves us, oh

Yeah, He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves

We are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If His grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking
And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about, the way that…

He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves

Yeah, He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves

Yeah, He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves

daily life, statesJanuary 1, 2010 10:25 pm
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We celebrated New Year’s inside our "cave" while the rain pounded against the roof and our neighbors shot off fireworks and cheered loudly.  As the clock struck midnight (or our phones did anyway), we toasted, said a quiet "Happy New Year" and shared a passionate kiss.  It was sweet and simple.  And wonderful.
 
I’ve always thought New Year’s resolutions rather cliché.  I do understand the significance behind the idea; new year, fresh start, let’s resolve to better ourselves.  Cliché or not, I’m making a list this year.  I really like what Sarah Dessen said: "There are a few things I’ve decided I really want to try to leave in 2009… Like guilt. I have a lot of it, for various reasons and various things, and it’s really exhausting, like carrying around a backpack full of heavy rocks. I am ready to put it down and move on, lighter. So I think I will write down all the things I’ve felt guilty about this year, put the paper in the fire on New Years Eve, and send it up the chimney to the sky. Hopefully my guilt will not settle back down over me in ash form. Blow away, blow away!"  She also said that she’s learned to make resolutions that are realistic.  My realistic resolutions:
 
1. Journal more.
 
2. Expand my meal repertoire (not gonna quantify it just to keep it simple).
 
3. Breathe deep and move on.
 
4. Forgive, forgive, forgive.
 
5. Call my grandma at least once a month.
daily life, states 12:00 am
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May this new year bring many wondrous and beautiful beginnings.
 
Happy 2010.
daily life, statesDecember 30, 2009 2:29 pm

I’m one of the leaders for the children’s ministry at our church.  Being able to contribute to the church community has been such a blessing, but I’ve had to miss a lot of the services to stay in with the kids.  We recently did a series called "Biographies" about the "background" characters in Jesus’ life.  It started with a message about Mary Magdalene and how maybe she wasn’t the woman everyone thinks she is these days.  Who she really is could threaten our views on female leadership in the church.  But is that really a bad thing?

The second message is about Princess Herodias.  I find this is more about the nature of names and how God is known by so many names and how an understanding of those names creates a fuller picture of who He really is.

The third is about the Centurions and how, even though they represent the Jews being oppressed, they are always spoken about in a positive light and challenge our beliefs in some way.

Just listen.


statesDecember 25, 2009 12:00 am
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Merry Christmas!!
daily life, statesDecember 17, 2009 11:46 am

I am officially halfway done with my undergrad Senior year.  Yeah, baby.

daily lifeDecember 3, 2009 2:52 pm

Sometimes I feel incredibly small.  Life and the world is so big and who am I but one little soul in the vastness of humanity?  I see the accomplishments of others and wonder what I’m doing with my life.  But I’ve still got school for one more semester so I’ll feel like I’m doing something for a few more months.  I have plans of course, but life rarely goes where it’s expected to.

Meh, it’s a gray day.

daily life, statesNovember 26, 2009 4:12 am

I have so much to be thankful for.

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I live in a country that, despite its problems, allows me to enjoy freedom of thought and religion and speech.  There’s such a rich diversity of people and opinions, it’s really a beautiful thing.  I’m thankful for the freedoms I enjoy and those who have fought and do fight so we may keep those freedoms.

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There is so much left to my journey, so many roads to travel and so many experiences to be had.  Despite my young age, I feel like I have already had rich experiences.  I’m thankful for the journey that has brought me to where I am now, and I’m hopeful for whatever my future holds.

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I live in such a beautiful world, one that reminds me daily of the great God I love.  In every sunset, every unfurled flower, I see His love for me and that gives me joy.  I’m thankful for the little things God does to remind me of His great Love for me.

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I’m save by grace, redeemed by blood and forever forgiven.  What more could I want or need?  My faith means so much to me, is a core part of who I am.  I’m extremely thankful for my salvation and the outpouring of constant grace that He gives.

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In getting married I gained a "new" family, one that I greatly look forward to getting to know over the years.  I’m thankful for marriage and this new life and the new people I am blessed to know.

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I’m so blessed by my family.  There’s no way to quantify the rewards I have received from them.  They have been my foundation and my support from the beginning; I don’t know where or who I would be without them.  I love them dearly and am so thankful for them and the role they’ve had in my life.

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Last but not least, Jason.  Where do I even begin?  He’s my best friend and loves me so unconditionally.  He really exemplifies for me God’s love for humanity.  Despite my shortcomings, he loves me and continually reminds me of that love.  He supports my dreams, dries my tears and lifts me up when I have stumbled.  I am so thankful for this forever love that I have in human form, he is the most important person in my life and I hope to love him in the way that he loves me.

********************

This short list does not even scratch the surface of my gratitude; I have been blessed beyond belief and every day I am reminded of those blessings.  There are unseen things too that are happening in my life; some of those will be revealed to me before I close my eyes for the last time, some will be revealed after that.  Whatever those things are, and the ones not mentioned here, I lift up my heart and my eyes to the Father and say "Thank you" for all that He has given me.

statesNovember 24, 2009 12:34 pm

A few weeks ago I came across this wonderful song by Tenth Avenue North.  It’s perfect for the brokenhearted, which as flawed humans we often are.

daily life, statesNovember 18, 2009 11:08 pm
http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/01%20-%20January%2091KM%20Kimi%20reading%20to%20Micah%20on%20couch.JPG
 
That "little" guy turned 19 today.  I can’t believe he’s in his last year as a teenager; it seems like only yesterday I was returning from Japan to find my little brother driving.  Driving!  It’s been a good 19 years though I don’t really remember the first few years.  I was quite a bully in those early years, making him wear dresses (sadly I don’t have that picture on me) and just using my lager size to take advantage.
 
 http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/04.08.71.%20Post%20Mexico.jpg
(back when we were the same size — post Mexico)
 
Now he’s bigger than me but part of me still sees him as my little brother.  We’ve had some falling out periods and have not always gotten along, but most of it has been great fun and he’s kept me sane (I could never be an only child).
 
 http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/041031.055.Kimi%20and%20Micah%20as%20gangsters,%20Halloween.JPG
(gangsters ‘04)
 
I’m really proud of the journey he is on and I’m so excited to see what his future holds.  I love my brother and friend.
 
 http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/070719.0313%20Kimi%20Micah,%20Ranch,%20Tecate%20MX.JPG
 
Happy birthday, you crazy kid.
 
 http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/09.08.03.6845.JPG
daily lifeNovember 12, 2009 11:09 pm

I was reaching my hand into the drawer to retrieve the measuring cups.  I was going to make crust for quiche and berry pie (yum on all counts).  I felt a sharp prick on my middle and ring finger and quickly drew my hand out of the drawer.  OUCH.  Blood was seeping from the two wounds.  It was pretty gross.  Long story short, I didn’t make the crust or the quiche or the pie.  Sad day.  Maybe tomorrow, if these bad boys are feeling better.

The culprits:
http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/09.11.12.7758-1.JPG

The ouchies:
http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/09.11.12.7755-1.JPG

daily life, states 10:34 pm

I’ve been going through my blog and looking at different posts and I realized how much I miss this outlet.  I’ve either been too busy or I haven’t been inspired.  I itch to get that inspiration again, to hear the words in my mind and see them form in front of me.  This semester has been the most paper heavy of my entire college career (another reason I haven’t written much).  And it’s not quite over yet.  I have one more big paper that I’m working on though it’s not due until December 10th.  It’s getting to that point in the semester where I just want it to end and I know that that reality is close.  After tomorrow there’s only three more instructional weeks left with one week for Thanksgiving break nestled in there.  I can’t believe it. I’m almost halfway done with my senior year of college.

I’m not sure what I’m doing once I’ve graduated; there’s a possibility that I’ll work with someone from our church who’s starting her own home daycare in June.  But that’s not really where my passion lies.  I still want to work with at-risk youth and their families.  Jason’s co-worker and I were having a discussion the other day on this very subject.  We decided that work needs to be done at ground-zero.  Children need to be given opportunities and support from the beginning.  This is especially true for children who live in inner cities or are born into poverty.  Their options are limited before they are even born and that greatly affects their future possibilities.   One of my classmates just did a presentation on the cradle to prison pipeline where children are born into circumstances that basically lead them straight behind bars.  There is something very wrong with that.  Communities need to come together and take care of their children.  Society needs to place higher priority on the well-being of the littlest citizens.  These children need people to stand up and fight for them, they need people to care and not just see their need but do something about it.  It’s great that the U.S. sends out so many missionaries to other third-world countries but we need more of focus on the third-world citizens living within our borders.  These are concerns near to my heart and they are what inspire me to get out there and make a difference in this broken world.

daily life, states, inspirationsNovember 8, 2009 7:51 pm

 http://journeys.blogsome.com/images/DSC07722.JPGIt’s been a crazy October.  I had a lot of projects, papers and presentations due but now that I’ve turned them in and completed them, I feel like the semester is winding down.  We’ve had some great fellowship in the last month and lots of good times.  I know what my last semester of college is going to look like and life is moving along nicely.  I have five more weeks of this semester left (not including Thanksgiving break but including finals) and I’m so excited for the end. So.excited.  Today also marks our three month anniversary, we’ve been married for a quarter of a year!